Update on Mom

Dad, Mom, and I went to Baptist Hospital in Winston on Friday to visit the cancer specialists there for a "pre-biopsy" consultation. The doctors and nurses there are wonderful -- a couple doctors came in and looked at Mom's records and scans, then spent a lot of time talking with us and answering our questions. They laid out the options for the various sorts of biopsies and the possible treatments, but it was soon clear that, given the very large size of the mass in her right lung, the large amount of fluid there, the fact that it has spread at least to her spine, and her already seriously deteriorating condition from the FTD she's been suffering from, any of the types of biopsy they might do would be more stress and pain than any potential knowledge gained would justify. As both doctors explained, surgery is out for her, due to her weakened condition, and chemotherapy or radiation (aside, possibly, from palliative radiation) would only make her sicker, with no gain in enjoyable life.

They did suggest a PET scan, which should not be stressful or very invasive (just a sugar dye injection), and will show the extent of the spread of the cancer, helping to facilitate palliative treatments (especially valuable since she can't speak or clearly indicate where she hurts). The nurse there -- a very kind woman -- made an appointment for her PET scan at Baptist (our local hospital doesn't have the machine) on the 20th of this month, and then for an appointment with one of their oncologists, who, fortunately, spends two days a week at the cancer center at our local hospital. So Mom shouldn't have to make the trip to Winston again, after the PET scan. It sounds as if there are services and doctors locally so that we should be able to keep her as comfortable as possible at home.

It was a very hard day. The whole "cancer" thing is so unexpected. But the doctors and nurses couldn't have been kinder, showing no impatience at all at our (my) repeated questions. And my poor, sweet mom is so very brave. Her comprehension skills are still just fine, but she is unable to ask questions or express her fears. I know life is not "fair," but... well, it Should be more fair. At any rate, we are determined to keep her as comfy as possible, surrounded with love, tempted with tasty foods, and generally cherished. She's spent a lifetime selflessly nurturing other people, so the least we can do is remember to keep a couple Hershey bars in our purse to be able to hand her when the occasion demands.

(Here we are waiting to see a doctor, yesterday. My dad always has a book ready to read aloud to Mom. He's pretty amazing.)

(Ed and Mom. They've been enjoying "The Paradise.")

(Mom and Dad over for mid-day dinner today. Lemon chicken. I am a culinary goddess. But Katie beat the pants off us all in round after round of Bananagrams. Good thing she's otherwise a charming girl.)

(And Kali. Looking resentfully at Finny, who jealously guards his "favorite child" station next to me, and also his toy hoard. He has now ripped Piggy's squeaky ball heart out -- looks like he'll be getting a new squeaky pig for Christmas!)