Happy Mother's Day

My mother is a woman of exceptional kindness, grace, and intelligence. Almost all the things that I do right, as a wife, as a mother, and as a person, are things I've learned from her, and the things I do wrong are generally where I've failed to follow her good examples. Not that she mentions the things that I do wrong. She has a mind-bogglingly good memory (she always remembers people's birthdays), but she never brings up any of my stupid mistakes. She has always responded to the thoughtless, and occasionally cruel behavior of her loved ones with compassion and forgiveness. When I was growing up, she always told us that what she had really wanted to be when she grew up was a mother, and she mothered joyfully. My childhood memories are of family activities: being read to, baking, hikes, cookouts, and so on, though somehow she also managed to keep the house clean, cook, shop, and do all the laundry. She read me Strawberry Girl, Linnets and Valerians, and many more that I am looking forward to reading to my own little K. When I was a teenager, and full of ideas and myself, she made me sandwiches when I came home from school and encouraged me to talk about what I thought about things. There must have been so many times when she had to restrain herself from shaking her head and muttering, "Oh, for goodness sakes," but she is good at restraint, and she always did. She never lectured on the importance of kindness, honesty, or gratitude, but she modelled those and other virtues for us every day.

Now that I am (finally) a mother, I appreciate her patience and optimism in ways that I didn't before I had children. The fierce, bone-deep mother love that became part of me when my children were born did not come with the gifts of unfailing gentleness, humor, and wisdom. Those are things that I have occasionally but more often have to struggle for. My mother was eleven years younger when she became a mother than I was when T. was born, but I never saw her struggle for these things. Today's picture is of me as a started looking infant with my beautiful mother. Passing years have grayed some of her hair and given her a few lines, but the essence hasn't changed. With kindness, laughter, and self-effacing generosity, she reaches out to family and friends and makes the world a little happier.

Happy Mother's Day, Mommy! I love you.